Behind Blue Eyes

Booop.

For your info, Lilian's computer is konked, and waiting to be kinked (insidejoke). We'll be hearing from her soon! :)

*

It seems like just yesterday everything fell into perfect place. But right now, its starting to come out, piece by piece. And I'm afraid.

All I am capable of, is spectating, or lending a shoulder. I hope, and pray that this will soon be over, and we can get back to our place where the sun shines on us everyday. I hate to see all my beloveds in this state right now. I'm not going to eloborate, but for my thoughts. I just want to see the smiles again, not the frowns.

loves.

*

I understand how you feel right now. I know you're in a bit of confusion, the crowd just gets bigger, and you have lost your way. Just so you know, you will always see a familiar face and I do hope things will get better. Take your thoughts once at a time, because they don't speak for you, you speak for you. Don't let the frustrations get over to you okie? You know I love you,kay? :)

Hope the light shines on you at the end of the tunnel :)
You know who you are.

*

Like the colours of the pallette, they are slowly fading.

*

My mum sure knows how to make me feel better. I have been ranting to her for the past few days just to get it outta me, and she's got a long weekend. So, she promised to take me out on Monday to get Korkor's present and do my own lil walking. :)

*

P/S : I've missed you guys taking my food sooo much! I'm soo going to make a batch of cookies or muffins after the PMR week.

P/P/S : All the best to all PMR candidates! You'll do great! :) :)

*. Much Love

You Don't Have To Think Twice

Lets just say, I had a very fun-filled weekend. One of the only weekends of fun that I have before I head back to the four walls of my so-called 'paradise' for the next 8 weeks.
It sucks to even know that the end is coming near. Not because of the exams, but the years that have gone, just happened so fast!

I'm still waiting for our outing Liliannn! :D It'll come sooon.:)



Two years of familyhood, definitely has changed how I've become today. Nothing can ever replace the fun we had! And sitting behind three adorable monkeys just made life sweeter despite the bitter drops that came. Not only that, I have found absolute happiness in five of my loveliest ladies in the world and eight of the most dear monkeys who stands by you, you'll never imagine.



But, this two years was also holding on to the past. The bond of the five of us, through out a decade of friendship and still going strong, I could not ask for more. The two of us and one in Langkawi, and of course, the lovely people who made a mark in my life, its just beyond my control that the year is going to end, so fast.



I'm definitely going to miss bringing and smuggling food to the class, while teacher's are teaching and we are behind passing containers filled with food. I'm gonna miss baking for my dearies and it just makes my world go round when they actually enjoy them despite me making certain mistakes. Honestly, your pancakes had a little bit too much flour and a little sugar. ;)

Sorry!



The exam stress. Mymy, that was always the funniest. Racing to finish as many chapters as we can and memorizing every single bit of information. Crazycrazy. Growing our hair white was what we always went through together. And when the results are out, every tear we shed was always wiped dry cause we'll know there's always another chance to make it better.



Somehow, the crazy fetish for Korean Boybands just goes on and on. The fight for who belongs to whom, the endless teasing on how gay they can be (not so gay as peacock), the name calling (ISH) and the part where they are actually deciding who is going to prom with whom ( IM NOT GOING ANYMORE KHEISZE :) ) Never once will we go to school without hearing the talks and updates of so many Korean superstars. In fact we've lost count. And the many times I had to hear how stupid CR/CF (HEE) is, and that I was betraying either way!



But, I never did, cause they've always won, right? :D



No one can ever forget the lameness that grew like bacteria in this class. Every single thing we do, we can, and I mean CAN make a joke out of it. Whether you're using a pencil, or some jingbang cool notebook, everything. Seriously, and no one bothered to stop it. So, no one's to blame. And all the crazy physical targets Yong Meng had to go through. I salute Meng Leong, cause he is able to endure every silly antic Wei Kit does, and our silly lame jokes.



Now, we're all so worried of leaving each other! I mean, the year is towards a closing end, and the only chance I have is my birthday and Christmas. After that, some of us have NS (hoping very much we'll all be in the same camp) and college, but by then cross my fingers that we'll have a car and we'll br cruising around, continuing where we left off from this year :D



Alright, I should stop blabbering now. Mmm , I'm growing fatter by the minute. AAHH!

SPM, I blame it on SPM.

*. Much Love

Something To Laugh

This cheered me up so much.

Its amazing how one's little gestures, means a whole lot. :)
Enjoy!





depicted from RVN

P/S : Lilian owes us two posts! :D HEEEE. I'm MEAN. :D
A moon has a round face, two eyes, a nose and a mouth.

Much Love *.

And Though I've Tried, I've Fallen.

I knew this was coming.

Though of I've been given a great option,

I have no thoughts of going through the ordeal once again.
And I don't want to let anybody down , especially my

dear wonderful teacher.

I expected to pass maybe by a mark, but I hoped too much

for something that I honestly didn't put much effort in.

Maybe, its what I deserved .

Or maybe, I'm just not musically-inclined, afterall.

In the lonely light of morning
In the wound that would not heal
It's the bitter taste of losing everything
That I've held so dear.

Much Love*.

No Tears Left To Wash Away

Just got home from my uncle's place in Shah Alam. Setia Eco Park. Mmhmm. Very lovely indeed. Everything is almost furnished.I love the colours the wall and I'm fascinated by this :





So calm and gives a feel of serenity, doesn't it? I admired this picture, ever since I saw it in my uncle's old place in Megah.

Grams and I.

Notice that the houses, have no gates? Yeah, and opened air, no-fencing. Really nice concept and very homey too.

But, there weren't any movers. Just my uncle and another two or three neighbours. So, mum was nice enough to let me have my first taste of driving. HEEEEEEE :D
Its awesome, for a noob like me. :D

*

Well. The moody side of me caught up yesterday. I had really the best company. The rain and the window. Its symbolic, in the sense.



Not long after that, a very concerned friend cheered me up, and asked me to do her a favour. Although I've detested him for quite awhile (I admitt, as a little girl, I was fascinated), in words, I took the courtesy to watch it.



Six videos long.



But, its amazing, how much you think he's the opposite in sexuality (in opinion), and it turns out,

he happened to live quite an interesting life. And it was all mashed up to a mere 60 minutes. Somehow, I put aside the part where I called him * and how I was seriously disturbed by *,



and listened to his side of the story.



Adrenaline junkie, he calls himself. And pops the most outrageous questions :

Do you think Earth is a billion years old?

But aside all that, you begin to know what its really like out there.



Honestly, I still find him disturbing and *, but I admitt his life isn't any ordinary one.

*

From that yesterday, it was like a reflection. I woke up early, possibly to do a bit of revision, and I can't help but question alot of things.



I realised, there are answers to every question in this world.



We just haven't seen it yet, but we're finding it out, day by day, baby step by baby step. (:(:

*

I am literally promoting Evanescence for my weekend player.

Have you analysed their lyrics?



Call me gothic, but I've taken the time this morning to listen word for word. Among them,

'Lithium' , 'My Immortal' and 'Breathe No More'. Yes, the sounds are dragging and oh-so-monotonous. And oh-so depressing. Not to anyone's liking.



But their lyrics have a very big meaning to them.



Amy Lee, to my opinion, is brilliant. Though the music is downing, nothing symbolic to a joyful day, but if you take a close look to the meaning behind the song, you'll know why (:

*

Whoa, thats a lot of reflection. Damn, I'm growing up! (: (:

Much Love *.

Fix You

Perfection. Something I never thought would turn ugly.
I'm regretting ever having my heart beat faster when you camee.
What a turn-off.

But I realised why I ever did in the first place.

But, you'll never know.

*

Lights will guide you home,

And ignite your bones,

And I will try, to fix you.

Tears stream down your face

When you lose something you cannot replace

Coldplay - Fix You

*

There wasn't any use of getting up so early in the morning, just to think that I was doing right.
I still let myself down. I had not shown it, but deep down, the cuts and bruises are there. Its
as if I'm in virtual hell, without the fires but with the waters.

I know I shouldn't be asking for more, but somethings are based on your expectations.
And when it doesnt touch, its as if, the world can crumble like a cookie, leaving the crumbs
for those who have not had their share.

I let myself go. I need a break.

I wonder,
Will the sun still shine for me and cast my shadows behind me?

Don't fill my dreams with virtual apparitions.
I want to let go of you.

*. Much Love

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!

Look who's seventeen today..

awww... doesn't he look sexy?? ahahha..

Happy Birthday, QUAN YUAN!!!!

Well, let's see, turning 17 means you're eligible to drive!!!!

EHEM.. drive me around??

I love you!

I hope you enjoyed ur birthday!!!

*

Thank you, yea sabby... for everything. Thankss to charissa too!!!!!! Thank you for being there for me, yea... Thanks to joanne and khei sze too!!!

Gosh la, i love you guyss!!!

Well, gtg... study physics. N SOME PEOPLE don't have to even touch them. Ahhaha..

Toodles..

And They Say That A Hero Can Save Us

I've known him throughout the five years of

being in the same class together.

Helpful, always there to give you a cheer,

and damn right never is self-centred.

And now, this boy,

has turned the big seventeen.

He gets to drive his X-trail.

Damn it Lilian! ;)

Happy Spunky Seventeenth,

Tan Quan Yuan!

Lets put it this way,

5 years, and still counting! :)

*. Much Love

You're My Shooting Star

Remembering that sorrowful day.

To the bravehearts, who solely took the responsibility to save others willingly.

To the innocent, whose lives are cut short because of this terror that shook the world.

To those who are staying strong for the last six years.

It has taken its toll, to remember today.
(11.9.2001)

*

Part 1 [FRIENDS CHOICE AWARD]

1) Most Female Hottie
#No one in particular. Every girl I know is hot in their own way.

2) Most Male Hottie
#Same thing here. If Fabregas/Ronaldo was my friend, the award would have went to him. :D

3) 2 of the Most Trustworthy
#Chiaw Yee and Lil

4) Best Listener
#Chiaw Yee.Lil.Cynthea. KittyWeng

5) Most Needed Shoulders
#Cynthea

6) Greatest Male Singer
#Jayden. Erm, Wei Kit? HEE :)

7) Top 2 Whores (camwhores)
#Hmm. Thats a toughie.

Overall Winner - Hah. There's a winner ? ;)

Part2 [FACTS]

1) What are you currently thinking of?
#How badly I screwed up.

2) What kind of clothes are you putting on?
#Loose fitting shirt / shorts.

3) Who is the last person you chat with via msn
#Cynthea!

4) Did someone manage to influence you nowadays?
#Nope. Maybe they did, I wouldn't know.

5) What have you done just now
#Ate lunch.

6) What kind of theory you have just created ?
#Life ain't a bed of roses. But, when you're ready to get up, pull out the thorns, because you
still have the pretty petals to look out for.

7) Which music score are you learning ?
#Ben Jelen's Come On in piano.

8) Do you stay up late nowadays ?
#Yes.

9) 4tags go to ?
#Lil & Quan Yuan (better update! :D)
#Cynthea
#Meng Leong
#Vanessa

10) What's your definate abomination ?
#When the world falls down on you, and you can't seem to begin your ways.

Much Love*.

But Nobody Said It Will Hurt So Bad

Its how you handle it.

Don't hide yourself, no more.

*. Much Love

Monday mornings

It's like being smacked in the face finding out those words i said mean nothing.



It's amazing really, how life can be such a bitch at times like this!



The day wasn't that bad as it started out.



But i was right, it's not okay.

Drown me in misery

Sometimes, life's just so hard, u know?

It makes you have panda looking eyes, sore from crying. Makes you lose your temper at someone u love. But by the time you realise what damage you've done, it's just goddamn too late, you know. You can't do or say anything to make it right..

Just probably hide yourself under the blanket and sob because you know you've screwed up. And in that process pray that everything's gonna be okay the next morning.

But it won't be, would it?

I mean if nothing helps in the situation, it won't be, would it?




I'm sorry.

Sunday Morning Rain Is Falling

Long morning I had today!

I felt very, uneased and moody today. My head spins around like a ballerina,yet I don't find the cause. Church in the morning, and of course my favourite priest was preaching today. They played one of my favourite songs, and unevitably the song which I cry almost everytime I hear it. And yet, I couldn't hold myself any longer.

All of my frustrations, my endless moaning inside. Dampered out by a single prayer.
Its been/ gonna be a very hard month for me.

After church, breakfast, headed to OU for grocery shopping, back to Digital Mall to find that the phone guy didn't open his shop. I bet he ran away. Ish.

And the worst thing is, my mum wants to take my brother out tonight. My sister (surprisingly) got up early and said she wanted to go too. Which also means, I have to go because my mum made her "please-go-lah" bubu look (which was funny and I didn't record it).

Which also means, I'll update later to compensate my hours of books! :)

Much Love*.

V.I.P

also means Very Important Pact.

Khaw Li Lian

promises

to update AT LEAST once a week.

And

will update AT LEAST once a week.

note : at least also means 'more than'.

HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

:D

You Can Stand Under Our Umbrella!

Heeeee.

As you can see, the both of us got up this morning and this blog was born!

Big thumbs up to Lilian for the layout at the side! :D

Everyone is resembled as a crystal bead . No matter what the hardships are, we still have the thread to hold us on. Everyone is blessed and beaded, in each and every kind of way. Thus,

blessed beads became the name, and we are 'beading' everyday through life. :)

*

Just got home from the Prefect's Hi-tea. Had tons of laughter and fun. Our table was merely the noisiest, but I guess its all good in the end. Lots of camwhoring moments, and unrelevant clapping when teachers walkby.

Especially special teachers we try to butter up to save ourselves. *hint.

And I had to take part in the Watermelon Eating competition.
Everyone there knew what I've done. I'm not gonna say ;)

But all in all, it made me feel a whole lot better from yesterday. Still can't get over the fact, but I've gotta face it anyhoo.

And the effects of boredom, and the fact that you are desperate,

You look for the pillar of strength
:)

Dinner time!

*. Much Love

Leap of faith

Gosh, been a long day!

The minute i woke up, i found myself looking for my family members and well, none of them were there except my bro sleeping like a pig.

I seriously thought it was a nightmare. Honest. Scare the hell outta me! My parents went to their office with my maid n sis. So, ALMOST home alone.

Met sabby pretty early in the morning n she came up with a brilliant upon brilliant idea.

Yeap, create a blog together!

Ahaha.. I hope that'll keep me updating.

Anyhoo.. Gosh, we had fun deciding the email that we'll share.. the password.. AHAHAHA.. that one is a good one, sab!

Owh, u guys can always always email us at lilnbrina@hotmail.com Remember that already? That's lilnbrina which kindda like stands for lilian and sabrina if u haven't figure it out.

Owh yea, btw, i kindda toogled with the settings and i ended up with some funky icons at the sidebars. Well, if any of you readers know how to remove it, well, can you kindda teach this noob to remove it? ahaha..

Well, well, gotta run now.

Toodless..

Lots of love. <3

Trying Out

Heeeeee.

I got a little bored. So, hence, the new blog. Might just use this.

New leaf (: